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rosaenaluin 65F
9913 posts
10/8/2018 2:59 am
There we go again,


It is really something that totally surprises me, time and time again,
i read some blog or a might be interesting profile,

and time and time again,
i am shocked by sooo much stupidity, with soo much ignorance, totall lack of understanding the basics of BDSM, or just the way your own body function.

And - THAT - calls themselfs subs and doms?? REALLY?
it is a shame and waste.

Do People Not Think, On Their OWN, anymore...?
apparently.

herd - flock mentality, that an sich, says enough ofcourse....
soooo... NO BDSM,

This book, a very well known book by people who are respected in the scene.
Different Loving, Too,
by DR. Gloria G. Brame with William D. Brame.

In this book people talk about their BDSM life and their commitment to their local scene, how they helped form that new community, how they struggled with themselfs and the authority.
how things changed from deep underground to be out there as a Domina or slave, or Master...

Even in this Book, there is this person who really, out loud, tells them;
No body, no matter how horny he/she is, is able to play IT 24/7....amp;

How do you mean; Play IT???
Play what!?

They all behave like brain dead sheep!!
For crying out loud!

Anyway,

24/7 is a mental state, a want, it is the willingness, the urge inside someone, that inner need, to belong to that particular Dominant Master.
Fully and totally.
Not witholding anything.
totall openness= 24/7.

If you did monitore your own behaviour during and after having sex
you know dawn well, you need time to get back together again.
Also, let me tell you something new, apparently...

BDSM DOES NOT EQUAL SEX. BDSM DOES NOT EQUAL SEX.

There are couples were there is no sex in their TOTAL POWER 24/7 DYNAMIC.
because they NEGOTIATE that that way...

Yes! i know!
This must come as a shock to all those vanilla players out there!
What?
NO SEX IN BDSM?
What am i doing here?? WHAHAHAHAH!

INDEED, that is something i am asking for years now,
what the hell do all those ignorant , stupid vanillas in the scene???

Why do you think, that need to recuperate will all of the sudden change?
Because you found some kinky play things to do in the bedroom???
For Crying Out LOUD. S H E E P........
Dont be such a dum ass morron.

Or, i rather have you keep behaving like that brain dead sheep, you apparently are,

because it makes it easier for us, who are really serious about the whole BDSM life, living by his rules, living by his hand, so to say...

It shows, you know!!
So show your totall lack of any BDSM based knowledge, proudly, please do!
so we have something to laugh about.

The other time, i was reading some topic about How to get in contact, at munches with women....
Yeah... well... seriously!
So, this one female tells on that forum, that if you dont socialise, if you dont smile enough, you wont get any pussy...?
Really...?

So, BDSM Is already become a new kind of pick up line....?

all of the sudden i feel very dirty.
very dirty.

I wish hospital made notice about how many BDSM related injury come in there, in a average week?!
I think, when that kind of date is getting out there, we all know it is time to close our doors again.
to all those ignorant vanillas/sheep.

It is getting more and more a danger zone.
Stupidity is no bliss.
New ones cant get their hands on real genuine knowledge about all the safety aspects about BDSM,
About their rights! as a slave, or sub,
About mentoring, about safety rules...

Because all those socalled players/ vanillas are making their own rules and "knowledge", dont want to take any advice from someone older and/or with more experience under his/her belt... dont want to learn.

It is all a big ego show, more and more; swingers, vanillas, sex players....

There are already closed groups, here in Holland, for D/s, M/s couples to come together, only when you are known to someone, who is known to someone, who is known... to that organisation, there is a possibility you can get accepted, They even have a try out period, to see if you really fit in,
understand that BDSM IS NO SEX act.
Is soo much more than just some bedroom fun.

There we go again.....

the scene is wise, if/when she decides to go underground again,
just to lose all those swingers, vanilla's, players, sheep.

I dont hate vanillas, i even have vanilla friends.

i hate it, when they act as if THEY invented BDSM
and have all the knowledge about BDSM,
that there is only THEIR way of BDSM.
= SEX GAMES= NO STRINGS ATTACHED=kinky fun.

lets have fun bdsm,

who cares about safety, stopwords, negotiation? being compatible?
who cares about safety zones where to hit and WHERE NOT TO HIT.
kidneys, liver, spine?
Who cares?

rosaenaluin 65F
10834 posts
10/8/2018 3:12 am

,
there we go again,


charlesmartel0 59M

10/8/2018 4:38 am

There are some of us that have examined ourselves deeply with respect to BDSM and know what we are and what we need. We're out here with our machetes, hacking through the underbrush of fakes and scammers.


rosaenaluin 65F
10834 posts
10/8/2018 10:31 am

charlesmartel0,
hahah, machetes! alright!

I am with you, on this.
dont lose hope, faith.
Be yourself.
even while it takes maybe a lifetime to find that one, who truelly understands your way of BDSM, and wants to be taken by her hand, by only you!


rosaenaluin 65F
10834 posts
10/8/2018 10:50 am

submissive4miss,
You are entitled to your own misconception/view about 24/7.

You work, you socialise, you go eat out, you go to the docter,
and, AND you are his property or in your case, her property

You follow her rules of conduct, because you both agreed to that!
of life, because you want that too.

every vanilla is still married, even when they visit family 3 states away,
every vanilla is stil married, when they go to their work, do shopping, bring the childeren to their clubs...

except vanillas have arguments about almost anything
for example
or are totally NOT interested anymore, in their spouse anymore
dont give attention to how she looks, behaves...

A Master-slave 24/7 is about living according to his rules, of life,
Because you both crave that.
she still can go to her work, and behave like he wants her too
wear what he wants her to wear, make-up or hair style, colour, anything they both find important.

ask permission iif she wants to drink some with colleagues after work,
because they made that descions.
Because it is important for them BOTH.
living by his rules, living by what they both negotiate about.

There is totall commitment in a 24/7 to each other.
How can that become bored?
Someone who really truelly wants to serve you in everyway you need
need, not want.
There is love in 24/7 TAT TPE dynamics.

maybe you should read up on the whole 24/7 real living it.

you work around the vanilla aspects of life, you stay his property, when working when sick, always and everywhere...
you dont let vanilla life interfere with your M/s.


rosaenaluin 65F
10834 posts
10/9/2018 3:09 am

Exhibitibi,

That was once the case, when people did not dare to call themselfs dom, only after some longtime mentoring & training of a long standing member of the Local Scene.
Someone who learned them the skills, not only of the toys, but also the emotionally being able to handle anything, what happened with this submissive they played with.

Nowadays they buy some cheap porn shop whips, (plastic) and all of the sudden they ARE dominants, NOT.

Practising BDSM is NOT without danger.

Thank you for your contribution!


rosaenaluin 65F
10834 posts
10/9/2018 3:25 am

submissive4miss,
Ah, now i understand what you were saying.

I think the comparison between M/s Powerdynamic, 24/7, being owned
and a vanilla mariage does not hold ground.

Because in most vanilla relation i have witnessed, there is no power exchange, there is more a kind of hidden power struggle... after a while...

Always argumenting about all and everything, undermine each others authority on every level....
So, most vanila men just give in, let the female make the descions, because they are sick and tired of always having to have these arguments.
That is my experience with vanilla relations, marriage. what i see around me...
friends, family..

Our vision are, i think a bit opposite of each other, that does not make your less of value then mine...
Yours hold ground too.
We are talking about the same topic, from different angles, i like that!

i can see were you come from, though, you wanting the female to be in charge, anyway,

Yes, when there is a willingness to listen, to see the others point of view, there is the opportunity to learn.
Thank you for explaining your view,


rosaenaluin 65F
10834 posts
10/9/2018 3:33 am

jagmeoffnow,

there is protocol, code of conduct, honor, behaviour,

because "playing" with the responsibilty of wanting to BE dominant, brings with it, a big amount being responsible in all your acts.
all the time.
Now i see people drinking alcohol, during some play party.
That was impossible, years back, when people were aware of the potential danger involved in the "games" they played...
Using soft drugs seem to be "normal" now too, during a scene...

Just because it is possible to do it, does not make that right to do it.
Just because you CAN do something, say with a single tail, does not say you should do it,
just because you are horny or half drunk, or half stoned out of your head...

These rules are there, as much for the safety of the Dominants, as for the safety of the subs...


rosaenaluin 65F
10834 posts
10/9/2018 11:53 am

Ah, that is what you call boredom?
Alright, i understand now, yes there are power dynamics build on totall isolation of the sub (m/v).
I know there are people who are wired that way, if they find each other, it is match made in heaven
I also have heard about male subs, who say they want that kind of dominance, but actually, they dont want to have any responsibility anymore, for anything..
It is a choice.

it would not ever going to work for me, though.
Being his property is what i crave for, having friends, family contacts, but always within the frame work of our agreed upon dynamic.
That is the core of every other contact. with his permission.
Hows that?


rosaenaluin 65F
10834 posts
10/10/2018 9:27 am

submissive4miss,
i have been in a vanilla isolating me, abusive 'relation'. Years and Years ago it was hell.
It has no appeal to me, at all.
Yeah, sometime to fantasise about it could be "nice"....maybe...?
just the fantasy.
we agree!


rosaenaluin 65F
10834 posts
10/11/2018 1:14 pm

Yeah, i am convinced when people try to isolate you, in what kind of relation you are in, does not matter much,
they have some personality structure that is not healthy, not for them and certainly not for the other person....
Somehow they are not hole... within themselfs.
wanting to isolate an other human being, stems from fear? of losing something they dont even possess? I dont know for sure....

Something is lacking or missing..? i dont know.....
I think their motivation is somehow crooked.... not to let the other person benefit from the situation....
no fun, indeed!
I like our exchange of thoughts about this,


rosaenaluin 65F
10834 posts
10/13/2018 1:59 am

Right!
that is something, it seems, most dommes/doms are afraid of
the LLLL word
llllooooveeee!
Without loving my Master, i would not ever be able to go that deep, for him,
as a masochist, that is, i am imaging...

without his love & understanding for me, there is only abuse left.

I would say; a submissive is a (very) mentally strong person!
To have the power to knowingly, surrender yourself fully,...?
You can not do that out of weakness....

Murray Roman?
interesting!
Ohjeah, i put that situation behind me, too.
Recognising the signs is really healthy.

The seemingly contradictions it what i soo much like in a M/s.
Thank you!


rosaenaluin 65F
10834 posts
10/25/2018 1:50 am

I know of sub men, who really like it, when the Domme is a bit distant, in her approach, That gives them a sense of having to work extra hard to become her submissive?

convention just because of the convention, is not something i am interested in.
I am different, i live by my own rules,
which i would LOVE to abondan, for HIS rules....

I see that happen, all the time,
It is something i dont understand, but i am not a male sub, so maybe there lies the problem?

Yes, i have met dominants, who really were uncomfortable to talk to, with me,
Because i somehow did not match their mental image picture/ or fantasy role? about how and what a sub should act?
There was no open communication flow... everything starts or stops there..
in my view.
If that dominant is not confident in his being? every thing stops there.

because i am not a doormat, i have questions, i am inquisitive, i can be very outspoken... and i like very much an open equal conversation, with humor and fun, most doms i met , just wanted the whole roleplay act, there and then.
Submit without knowing anything about him...? madness! and totally dangerous.

To me, that is totally impossible, since i dont know him...?
It seems most doms i met, were not used to that kind of subs?
wanted that doormat? or just a sexual submissive? Or the quick fix. ,
i dont know...

I can only speak from my experience in the Dutch scene.
I am, for sure, not - a do- me- sub.

Yes, it would be great if some dominas will give their view on this!
Ladys! Open up, would you, please!?



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