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AshleyChangeling 48T  
47 posts
3/24/2018 11:22 am
The power of suggestion

I've never really been one for porn, or at least not in the conventional sense. Sure, there are a handful of offbeat or very specific things I've seen which have stuck with me, simply because they have inspired ideas that I hadn't considered before. But in general, I find porn a bit, well, obvious (to watch at least - to appear in is a completely different topic!).

It's the same with static imagery as well, I think. I would rather see, photograph and wear things that leave something to the imagination, because I think the power of suggestion creates a far more potent effect both in terms of firing the creative synapses and inspiring desire. It's also why I find well-phrased discourse or well-written erotic prose so much more compelling than visual (moving image) porn, because I think they allow for a far more immersive and provocative internal experience.

I have found myself in a few situations where I have unexpectedly been asked, before a scene, what sort of porn I want in the background. It seemed rude to say 'none', particularly as it was obvious that the other people I was with on each occasion rather liked the idea. In some ways I found it distracting, in others a little bit of an affront - almost like I was not enough to inspire them alone and they needed additional stimuli. Did it also mean that we were fundamentally incompatible because they found enjoyment in something that I find a bit base, or did it imply that they didn't have the depth of imagination that I usually look for in my partners?

Do you enjoy porn, or have you ever used it to set a scene or as a background noise/visual for a scene? What draws you more toward someone or something - a visual which is very overt, or something that draws more heavily on the power of suggestion?

No right or wrong answers, just really curious to see people's own perspectives and personal interpretations. Perhaps I'll be a convert yet


AshleyChangeling 48T  
50 posts
3/24/2018 11:26 am

Oh, and an additional question - my blog pic (shot hastily this afternoon), overt or suggestive?


tinkerfun 46F
11150 posts
3/24/2018 11:58 am

I far prefer suggestive erotic photography than ‘all out there’ type or porn. My ex likes to watch porn so we could occasionally watch it together. He is a visual person and likes to see hardcore action. However, particularly at home, he wouldn’t use sound whereas if I was to watch porn I like to hear women in particular moaning. There is something special about a woman coming (for real and none of this porn faking/ exaggerating). I don’t like swearing at all and there seems to be a lot of that in porn which can put me off.

Generally speaking I much prefer using my own imagination. I can find watching porn can leave me feeling ‘flat’ afterwards and I can feel a little less connected with my partner afterwards if we have watched it together. Whereas if we have just focused on each other I can find it far more bonding x.


tinkerfun 46F
11150 posts
3/24/2018 11:58 am

    Quoting AshleyChangeling:
    Oh, and an additional question - my blog pic (shot hastily this afternoon), overt or suggestive?
Suggestive for sure x


AshleyChangeling 48T  
50 posts
3/25/2018 9:36 am


AshleyChangeling 48T  
50 posts
3/25/2018 9:44 am

    Quoting tinkerfun:
    I far prefer suggestive erotic photography than ‘all out there’ type or porn. My ex likes to watch porn so we could occasionally watch it together. He is a visual person and likes to see hardcore action. However, particularly at home, he wouldn’t use sound whereas if I was to watch porn I like to hear women in particular moaning. There is something special about a woman coming (for real and none of this porn faking/ exaggerating). I don’t like swearing at all and there seems to be a lot of that in porn which can put me off.

    Generally speaking I much prefer using my own imagination. I can find watching porn can leave me feeling ‘flat’ afterwards and I can feel a little less connected with my partner afterwards if we have watched it together. Whereas if we have just focused on each other I can find it far more bonding x.
Interesting - and yes, completely agree on the sound of a woman coming!

I think 'flat' is a very good way to describe that post-porn feeling; I guess I see it as either a very solipsistic thing or something that kills rather than heightens the imagination, which is kind of contrary to the point of sharing space and experiences with someone. I can imagine it as a quick reference tool though, perhaps, when seeding ideas outside of play to say 'how about something like this?'.


anteater14 61M
2229 posts
3/25/2018 1:23 pm

Looking at some porn when there is no other activity works depending on tastes, but it depends on what you desire from it - but needing it as background to a scene does seem somewhat unusual and I would surmise un-necessary.

Perhaps because I don't masturbate much, I have no need for it anymore, but for some it may be their artificial place to achieve climax ....... the number of viewers to my webcam and the fact that once I found a punter cracking one off suggests that others need a stimulus outside of their own imagination.

As concerns the outfit, I would say suggestive but also very alluring - I doubt my pink tartan skirt will fit as well as yours obviously does.

D xx

Carpe Diem - the past is history, and the future is bleak.


AshleyChangeling 48T  
50 posts
3/27/2018 4:55 pm

    Quoting anteater14:
    Looking at some porn when there is no other activity works depending on tastes, but it depends on what you desire from it - but needing it as background to a scene does seem somewhat unusual and I would surmise un-necessary.

    Perhaps because I don't masturbate much, I have no need for it anymore, but for some it may be their artificial place to achieve climax ....... the number of viewers to my webcam and the fact that once I found a punter cracking one off suggests that others need a stimulus outside of their own imagination.

    As concerns the outfit, I would say suggestive but also very alluring - I doubt my pink tartan skirt will fit as well as yours obviously does.

    D xx
Interesting - porn in general (and especially vanilla porn) doesn't really do a lot for me, but I can see how some people might enjoy it or use it for a number of different reasons. I guess the key for me really was I didn't like it in the background for my scenes, because I didn't like what it implied (wrongly, I'm sure/hope) about me being enough on my own to incite desire!


gosset_en_cel 61M

3/29/2018 5:29 am

Porn videos just to help to masturbate instead to be in the solitude of the bathroom or in front of the computer!
Erotic photography to enjoy a nice work of art. You know Helmut Newton, Nobuyoshi Araki... And your pics as well!


petinheaven 61M

1/12/2020 3:51 am

Nice to see you again, now in Amsterdam.
Would you like to catch up?
How's life?
outloook or skkkype



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